In my continuing attempt to provide simultaneous translation to those of you outside the gilded circle of professional services professionals, here is a supplementary explanation of terminology you should know. On the beach. This is actually an expression from the good old days before HR got its finger in everything. It does not mean that […]
Beach blanket bingo Read More »
Various publications including Forbes magazine recently published their list of the most annoying business jargon. Jargon, as we know, is a way for people to feel like they are at one with their chosen profession. It’s (literally) a way to say they know things that other mere mortals do not. Of course there is terminology
Supercalifragalisticexpealidocious Read More »
As we all know there are lies, damn lies, and then there are statistics. Or in my life, there are statistics, damn statistics and can you please stop with the damn statistics. The last thing I ever thought I would end up doing is working with statistics. That is because of my general lack of
Tell me lies, tell me sweet little lies Read More »
Apparently January is a great time to look for a job. Now that the holidays are over and there are no days off on the immediate horizon, it’s time to knuckle down and get some work done. This is when the slackers become blindingly obvious as there is no veil of general workplace levity to
I think it’s going to be a long, long, time Read More »
Another week, another list of dismal job prospects… Director, Liquidity Analytics. I am thinking the reason for this urgent vacancy is that around this time of year there is significant work involved in determining exactly when raindrops are about to turn to snow in order to properly inform the weather man when to switch graphics
As my job search continues, I continue to be bombarded with inappropriate suggestions from the helpful placement staff that patrol the internet. Clearly I have failed to adequately describe my qualifications and desired job specifications. I would feel bad about this lack of ability to make invisible web career mavens bend to my will except
Take this job and shove it Read More »
My job search continues, undaunted by the thousands of positions that currently languish without alignment to my skills, although I am beginning to suspect they do not align with anyone’s skills. I have no explanation for why a company would post a job so obscure that it will never be filled. Perhaps it is an
Apparently, fear of public speaking (glossophobia for those who are interested in official labels) affects 75% of the population. Clearly that’s not an issue for Bill Clinton or Barack Obama (or even Michelle). And I am happy to say I also belong to the fearless 25%, but that wasn’t always the case. I had no
Un-accustomed as I am Read More »
Online job boards are an essential evil of looking for a job today. You also need to run the gauntlet of badly designed HR software (Taleo, my finger is pointing squarely at you) that does not let you submit your beautifully formatted Guerrilla resume. Good thing the internet also lets you track down the name
All the science I don’t understand – it’s just my job 5 days a week Read More »
I once had a summer job in an office. This is different than having a summer job that is not in an office like the one supervising a summer playground program (where I learned to hate the smell of sunburned grass) or the one pasting new-fangled bar codes on library books (where, to quell the
Take a letter, Maria Read More »
