It’s been twenty-five years since Alanis Morissette released Jagged Little Pill. For each and every one of the years between then and now, she has had to suffer the scorn of English 101 students everywhere, because they are experts in recognizing and using irony as a device that can be verbal, dramatic, or situational, but […]
Okay. That thing I said a few weeks ago about having had my last lake swim of the season? I was wrong. My definitive final lake swim was the last weekend in September. That weekend, and the entire week preceding it, was gloriously warm and sunny every day. Although I had not dipped my toe
October, it’s Over Read More »
I’m already beginning to regret going back to school. “But didn’t you just graduate from something? Didn’t you already go back to school?” some of you might ask. And yes, I did, graduating just this spring. Part of the class of 2020 that will be forever remembered for its unique graduation circumstances, until the class
Good Morning, Little School Girl Read More »
For some reason, it only just dawned on me that every official season is exactly the same duration of three months. Summer begins on June 21 and ends on September 21, whereupon fall takes over until December 21 and so on through winter and spring, until summer rolls around again. I think it took me a
How was your summer? Read More »
At six-thirty on a recent morning, a time when most sane people are still sleeping, especially if they are at a cottage, I was jarred awake by what sounded like the start of a Formula One race. This is what it’s like on bass derby day. I have never been at the marina when the
Until now, I had not been to downtown Toronto in six months. First it was because of the pandemic perils, then the ice went out and I decamped to the cottage to hunker down for several months of swimming, sunning, and sloth. In May, when their office opened again, my dentist, who I’m sure thinks
There is such a thing as a double-decker pontoon boat. That’s all I’m going to say about that. Except for one thing. Double-decker pontoon boats remind me of Dolly Parton’s height-defying wig. It catches the eye, but is completely unnecessary and possibly dangerous. The wake from the excessively prevalent wake-boats spring to mind. But what
Cottage Status Report: 20200802 Read More »
We have acquired a ten-foot pole. Or actually, this pole has been around for some time, but it has been living under my radar. It is supposed to be an extension for poles you wish were longer, like brushes for washing stuff on the outside of the house. Or something like that. Whatever its real
Cottage Status Report: 20200722 Read More »
The red squirrel that Dennis caught the other day, down by the dock while I was swimming, has thankfully, I assume, been repurposed as dinner for a bird of prey. Maybe one of the ravens (are they birds of prey? Henry seems to think they are and makes sure to steer clear of them.) Anyhow,
Cottage Status Report: 20200715 Read More »
“Salads! A cool relief on a hot summer’s day!” the food magazine says. I am here to tell you this is not true. Not the eating of the salads, which is actually a very good idea, heat or no heat. It’s the making of the salads that is a completely ridiculous thing to do when
