This year marks 51 years since the first International Women’s Year and 41 years since the end of the momentous United Nations “Decade For Women.” Luckily, these events were all it took to bring those of us with two X chromosomes on par with those fortunate enough to have a ‘Y’ in the mix. Oh. Wait. Not so much.
According to results of study published in the New York Times, fewer large U.S. companies are helmed by women than by men named John. Further, of the 1,500 companies included in the Standard and Poor’s index, there are four men named John, Robert, William, or James for every woman sitting behind (as opposed to outside) the Chief Executive Office door.
Certainly, one thing that jumps out here is the unoriginal naming convention for boys. Over the past 100 years, the top five names for boys have been James, John, Robert, Michael, and William. (I’m guessing Michaels tend to be slackers since they don’t show up as much on the CEO list.) People take much more creative license when naming girls, with flagrant disregard for how that name might look when appended with “Vice President of Finance” (parents of LaToya, Krystal, and Tifanni I’m talking to you). Ironically, I think North West will make out quite well in that department since everyone will think she is a man (and she may well need this ‘leg up’ because by the time she reaches her nepo baby potential, Kim and Kanye will likely be yesterday’s news both for the gossip rags and their respective revenue streams). But I digress.
The truth is that conformity is the real ticket to success. The Jims, Bobs, and Bills are most comfortable with their own kind. One of the things aspiring female executives are advised to do is learn to play golf. That’s because the guys get a lot of ‘work’ done on the golf course. The theory is that if you can join the game you can compete in it. This of course is not true. The guys will humour you on the links, but the real conversations will happen in the men’s room on the 19th hole, the cigar bar, and the strip club.
You might recall the kerfuffle in 2012 when Ginni Rometty became the first female CEO of IBM. Subsequently, much angst ensued at the Augusta National Golf Club, because as a major sponsor of the Masters, IBM’s head honcho was always invited to become a member. One small problem: like most centres of power, the club was for men only. And it took them until 2014 to acquiesce. I don’t know what Ginni did, but if I had been her, from that point forward, I would have permanently camped out in the locker room flinging my unmentionables around. Either that or stationed myself behind the door with my Big Bertha driver and kneecapped random “real” members of the club.
Fast forward to only a few years ago, when a male subordinate told me not to worry my pretty little head about the progress of an important project I was in charge of. There are no words.